Born to Fail

I love writing, but most times I have a difficult time bringing myself to do it. Why? Not because I have too much to do- there are always moments I could squeeze it in (i.e. waking up early or getting off my damn phone).

We all experience this with different things. For some reason, we keep neglecting the things that bring us the most joy.

We love feeling vibrant and healthy, but choose to eat junk.

We love good conversation and connection, but we isolate ourselves.

We love an array of hobbies and activities, but we would rather stare at screens and see how others are doing it.

It’s not that we don’t want to! We do! We just choose to make other things that are not as constructive more important. Why? They are easy and they are safe. Doing the things we love can be hard. It takes time and dedication to commit to ourselves. On top of that, we have tried all the things we love- that bring us the most joy (not fleeting happiness. I’m talking the joy that fills your heart to the brim.) – numerous times.

You know what happened. Something came up and motivation was lost. Excuses began to be made. We decided, “It’s just the way I am. I am not that person. I am just made to live a sub-par life. God is cruel and life is a bitch.” I may be over exaggerating a bit- or not.

Either way it’s sliced, that cake of hope and a bright future was cut with the same knife: Fear. That is why we keep falling into the same routine of comfort and self-destructive tendencies, my friend.

Fear of change.

Fear of letting go of those old familiar habits.

Fear of losing our identities.

Fear of throwing ourselves out there and being vulnerable.

Fear of failing again (haven’t we failed enough?)

Time for a truth bomb: You are born to fail. We are all born to completely fail and smack our heads on rock bottom. We are also born to have our identity, and all the comforts we cling onto, ripped out from under our feet and thrown into a wood chipper. We are born to suffer, to scream, to cry, and to bleed our sorrows. There is no sugar coating it. It’s a part of life. You cannot experience life without that darkness.

Good news: We cannot stay down there forever. Once it is all experienced to the fullest- it must be embraced. We must embrace all that we are afraid of and have been avoiding for so long. Make friends with the monsters in the closet. Once that work is done, it is only up from there.

How do we get back up?

Just do it. We just need to have an idea of what we want to cultivate in life, and do it. It is by no means necessary to know what it is you will be doing the rest of your life, or to even know what direction you are headed in. It is about taking a step and following that foot with the other. We all have things we know we could be doing that have the potential of bringing us joy, but we cannot keep stopping ourselves from moving forward. Life is rich and abundant with opportunity and love. By releasing the old and choosing to no longer remain stagnant, we are opening ourselves up to the universe in a way that says, “I am ready for the blessings you have to offer.”

It will not be easy. We will keep failing, but just as we are born to fail, we too are born to succeed. We are born to live a life of peace, harmony, love, and transcendental bliss. We must first plow the fields, sow the seeds, and keep watering them as we brace whatever weather and pests come our way.

I wish you love and speedy recoveries from the low times as you embark on your personal journey. I am right Here with you. You are not alone in this.

P.S. If you have any questions, or need someone to talk to, feel free to contact me Here. If you are someone like me and need an accountability partner to stay focused and motivated, check out my coaching page Here to see what it is I do as a Health Coach and Accountability Partner. For deals, feel free to contact me.

4 Ways to Welcome the New Year

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

As we rolled into 2018, a few intuitions came to me about what is to come and how to prepare.

First: This year is going to be… amazing. We have been through so much craziness, we deserve a break, don’t you think? This year will deliver just that… sort of. It will be a break from all of the lower energies that have been swirling around, but we have a lot of work ahead of us! *rolls up sleeves*

This year we are being called back into ourselves and being thrown into action. It is time to stop ignoring the skeletons in the closet, and bring them out to be dusted off and danced with. We had better hurry though, because if that closet isn’t cleaned out in time, then all of the goodness coming our way will not be ready to be received.

It is also time to set action steps to help us reach the goals that have been swirling around in our minds. You may have already been doing a lot of hard work this past year, and that is great! The fruits of your labors will be delivered ripe and juicy soon enough.

If you put in the work now to release the old and start moving towards the new, you will see your dreams manifested in what seems like no time. Don’t get me wrong, it will be hard. It is work after all. However, once it is all said and you get the ball rolling, you will quickly adapt to this new positive lifestyle change and watch it snowball.

What can you do now to prepare for this new amazing life headed your way? Let’s get started:

 

Clean House

What better way to start off a new year than to make room for the new to appear? This is the perfect time to declutter, donate, dust and vacuum, reorganize, and anything else that needs to be done to make your space a sanctuary. Try burning some sage to clear out the negative vibrations and opening the windows for awhile, to allow the old stagnant air to get replaced with fresh air.

You can also take this opportunity to pamper yourself with a long shower, face mask, abhyanga (self-massage using warm oil), and any other practice you enjoy to feel the self-love!

As it is also after the holidays, this is a great time to start a gentle detox. Drink a lot of water (with lemon, preferably!), eat copious amounts of fresh fruits and veggies, and limit the consumptions of heavy foods such as meats and dairy. Make a commitment to yourself to cut out the refined grains and sugars, and anything heavily processed or fried in oil. Remember: eating healthy is a part of self care! By eating clean, you are cleaning yourself from the inside! Remember the saying “you are what you eat”? Your body utilizes what you put in it to create itself. Would you rather be made of fresh produce taken straight from nature, or heavily processed and genetically modified “food?”

 

Journaling

I can not imagine where I would be today without my journal. It has helped me the most out of any introspection practice I have tried. It is the perfect environment to release fears and start digging deep into what it is the soul has to say. Try out this guided introspection questionnaire [Found Here] to let go of the past and  set a foundation for the year to come:

  • Am I who I want to be?
  • Have I released the anger at my parents, my ex, myself?*
  • Do I worry too much what other people think?
  • Am I where I want to live?
  • What do I really want to do with my life?
  • What am I avoiding or afraid to look at?
  • Am I prioritizing my health?
  • How do I want to be remembered?
  • What’s something I have always wanted to do, but haven’t given myself permission to?

*Note: The new year is a perfect time to tie up loose ends. What words were left unsaid? What has been weighing on your tongue, but you never could get the words out? Consider writing letters to people or calling them to release any pent up emotions.

Invest in a planner

A planner is a valuable tool to keep the hustle and bustle of day-to-day life mapped out and manageable. Without a planner, I would lose control! Having one of these- and using it! – takes off a load of stress. It can also help to keep you accountable to yourself and your goals.

 

Consider a Health and Accountability Partner

How many times have you set a goal and fallen short? Are you passionate about your resolution this year, but can’t seem to find the motivation to follow through? This is something we all experience. It is not always an easy task to start new habits or projects. This is where a Health and Accountability partner could come into play. By partnering up with a certified coach, the mountain of to-dos seem less, and the life you want may be seen over the horizon. As a Health coach, I am trained to help people set reasonable goals to achieve their dreams. We also have the chance to dive deep into what could be holding you back from personally moving forward. Through looking into these fine details, you will have a clearer picture of where you are now and the ability to transform into who you are meant to be! More info here.

 

Good luck!

Self Care 101: Mind

 

“The challenges of the sixth chakra are opening the mind, developing an impersonal mind, retrieving one’s power from artificial and “false truths”; learning to act on internal direction; and discriminating between thoughts motivated by strength and those by fear and illusion.”

‘Anatomy of the Soul,’ Dr. Caroline Myss

 

It’s easy to get caught up in day to day life. Everything seems so important at the time. Hills look like mountains and slowly every little thing starts to pile up until you can’t think straight anymore.

It’s not your fault. It’s natural. Today’s world is fast paced and full of distractions. Even the people you surround yourself with have influence on how you think and act.

Today I strive to show you that it doesn’t have to be that way. You have the power to take back your own mind from all of these external influences and detach yourself from what is seemingly holding you down.

 

What… is it/does it do?

Difference between BRAIN and MIND:

->Brain commands the BODY.

It turns Thought into action

->Mind commands the ENERGY BODY.

It turns Perception into creation

 

What is it?

  • Central hub for information to flow through from our environment and perceptions. It’s where new thoughts and ideas form.
  • The mind is the command center for energy to be created into matter. Be aware of your thoughts, where they are going, and what they are manifesting. Thought precedes Form.

What does it do?

  • The mind processes all of this information, creates beliefs, and shapes the reality we live in. It can also determine how we react to each moment (think before you act).
  • Powerful manifestation tool. What you think and believe is what you are presented with.

 

Who… is the master of the mind?

Ego V. Self

When we allow the ego to take control, we become consumed by expectations, assumptions, and judgements towards others and ourselves. When we allow our self to take control, we are more easily able to take a step back and allow things to happen instead working towards a desired outcome.

Ego: What we think we are/ ideas of who we should be.

Self: What we know we are in our heart.

 

Where… do most of our mind sufferings stem from?

Fear, control, expectation

  • Fear stems from feelings of vulnerability. To become strong we must first allow ourselves to feel vulnerable. Dive into the dark places and release what it is that’s keeping you weighed down. Take that risk you KNOW you should do, that your heart ACHES for you to do, and trust the universe is supporting you and it’s all a part of the divine plan. We are all afraid of failure, of not living our best lives, of dying before we make a positive impact. All of this is keeping us from doing what it is we are meant to do.
  • Control stems from having preconceived notions of what should be. It is a false sense of power to feel in control in a situation. The truth is, we do not have control. What happens is meant to happen. The tree will grow, the sun will eventually die out, the planets will turn. It is as it is. What we can do is live to our personal fullest potential in each moment. Live compassionately and with an understanding for the wildness of the unknown workings that truly shape this reality.
  • Expectation same with trying to have control. You get an idea of what you want, but the universe will only ever give you what you need.

 

Why is it vital to calm the mind?

The mind is powerful. Our beliefs shape our reality. When we have a calm, open mind we are able to function better in our environment and work well with changes that are happening. Most relate a calm mind to a calm environment, thus having an aversion to change. This is not the case. A calm mind is one that can stand in the middle of all the chaos, trusting that what happens is meant to happen. It is a mind that allows all of this information to flow through without attachment to any one thing or one belief. It remains open, accepting, and free of pattern.

 

How… can I learn to work with it?
  • Meditation, trust in universal plans and intuitive abilities, release attachment  (to outcome and false and/or negative beliefs)
  • To work with the mind one must release fears, desires, need to control, expectations, and judgements. Release all that you think you know to be true and accept that everything changes. Everything has a natural flow and we must flow with it.
  • To release judgements, notice when they arise. See them in yourself. Know that what you are judging in others has stemmed from your Self. Release all judgements you have about yourself. Know you are a divine loving light being.
  • Release Fears. Trust the universe has a plan for you and all that happens is meant to happen. Everything that comes into our life is a lesson sent to help bring us closer to the self. Take risks and know that you are protected.
  • Release desire by not expecting a certain outcome. Release desire by cultivating integrity and hold dear only that which is fundamental to your growth. Get to the root of why you desire certain things.
  • Release expectation by being fully present in the moment. When we shape our future based on our past or have an idea of what we want to happen, it limits the possibilities to what could happen. There is no “should.” All that happens will happen. You happened and are here now. We all happen to be here now doing this for the reasons we decided to be here now, so we may as well get the most out of it and be here now. If we are not fully present, it will be harder to detect the subtleties of divine happenings and signs given to us in our daily life.

 

Summary

 

Do not fear to look within. Do not rely on external counsel. This will only create more power for the ego to feed off of. What is true for YOU? Be open to what the universe has in store for you.

 

No one choice is better than another. All choices are the right choices. Do not get to hung up on the decisions you make. Simply, make these decisions in line with your purpose.

 

Refrain from living in the past or worrying about the future. You are not there. You are Here. Doing so will only muddy right Now. Do the best you can here and now to improve the quality of moments to come.

 

You are all capable of improving the lives of others and your own lives by improving the quality of person you become.

 

Seek ONLY the TRUTH. Discriminate between truth and illusions.

 

Detach from preconceived notions. See only the truth in situations (often the middle ground. look at both sides).

 

DETACHMENT DOES NOT MEAN CEASING TO CARE

Once you have stilled the fear-driven voices and reached an internal posture of detachment, then all external influences will have no authority over you.

 

Less attachment and narrow-mindedness leads to openness and clarity of mind.

Would you rather drive through fog or on a day with clear sunny skies?

 

“Consciousness is the ability to release the old and embrace the new with the awareness that all things end at the appropriate time and that all things begun at the appropriate time.”

Everything is subject to change. Release the expectations and accept that what happens happens, and what has happened is in the past.

 

We have influence, but not control.

 

Your life is a continuous journey. It doesn’t matter where you start, so long as you have started.

 

Discussion Questions

 

What is your relationship with your mind?

What false beliefs do you often find yourself thinking?

Is there anything that helps you quiet and organize it?

What can you do to improve your relationship with your mind?

Soul Coaching: What it is & What it can do for you

If you have ever taken a glimpse into the world of health and wellness you would know it is a bit crazy. There are countless theories of what is right to eat and every person has the science to back it up. There are countless supplements and powders that you’re told to take on a daily basis. Everyone is so fit doing calisthenics, zumba, p90x, cycling, barre… what even is this stuff?! Most days it seems hard to even get a walk in aside from the one from the car to work!

You may have even tried some of these things or certain fad diets and detoxes, but just could not get it to stick. You keep ending up right where you started. It’s stressful and tiring. Why can’t I just live how I want without worry?!

Well, you can. There is something that has been missing from your endeavors. Maybe you’ve even figured it out but have had trouble committing to it. That thing is yourself.

It’s easy to get caught up in the noise of life and other people’s needs, and put yourself on the backburner. “I’ll just do it tomorrow,” “where’s the coffee,” “I already at 5, what’s one more?” and “when’s the last time I had a me day?” all become repetitive phrases in your mind. With a Soul Coach, you would be able to break the cycle of stress and self destructive tendencies, and shift your focus back onto your own needs.

For some people this may seem daunting. You may have the impression that it’s selfish to take care of yourself and put yourself first. I promise you, it’s not. I’m sure you have heard this before: you’re no help to anyone if you can’t first help yourself. If you can learn to love and care for yourself, you will naturally be able to radiate that love and care into your environment and those who surround you.

So what exactly is a Soul Coach? This is someone who helps you reach vibrant health and wellness by connecting you to yourself on a soul level. It is an intuitive guide and empath that can relate to you, understand and accept you, and lead you back to your inner knowing. A Soul Coach is an open heart and mind that you can freely speak with and release all of your fears and worries. Once you uncover all of the dirt, underneath you will find what it is you are truly passionate about and want for yourself.

With a Soul Coach you will learn to pave your own path. We are all in a different place and need different things, despite what all the health articles and dietary theories may say. Once you find what it is you desire, a soul coach can help you craft the goals to get you to where you would like to be.

It’s an accountability partner. Creating the goals is a great first step, but sometimes we need an extra push to keep the train moving. By partnering with a Soul Coach, you will be held accountable to your goals and encouraged to follow them, so that you can turn you life into your dreams.

If you are interested in learning more, you may check out my coaching page, or jump right in and schedule a Health Consultation with me. This first session helps you to lay out all it is that has been troubling you and figure out what it may be that you would like to start working towards.

By working with me you will learn valuable self-care techniques, gather skills to release stress, and be able to bring diet and lifestyle into balance simply by focusing on you!

What are you waiting for? Get to loving yourself!